(2004)

Submitted by Tornado Dragon

SHORT VERSION:
A lot of the craziness that has gone on turns out to all be part of a plot Jimmy and Cynthia (and partially Jill) cooked up to find and acquire Lazlo’s half of the first dollar he ever stole, since Jimmy has the other half.

In the end, a confrontation occurs with Jimmy, Oz, Cynthia, and Jill against Lazlo, his hitwoman Julie (who is Frankie Figueroa’s sister out for revenge on Jimmy), and his henchmen at Lazlo’s hideout. All of the henchmen wind up dead, and Jimmy then informs Lazlo that Julie was the one who had accidentally killed his son Strabo during an earlier assassination attempt she made on him, so Lazlo shoots and kills her. Jill wants to kill Lazlo, but Jimmy tells her that she can’t and admits it is because he is his foster father. However, he does let her shoot him in the foot. He then takes both halves of the dollar and then leaves with Oz, Cynthia, and Jill before the cops come to arrest Lazlo.

While driving away, Jimmy explains to Oz – who is terribly confused at everything that has gone on – that he has been after this dollar because it contains the number for Lazlo’s main account in the Grand Caymans, which holds $280 million, and he and Cynthia will get half of it. Jill then tells Jimmy that she is pregnant.

LONG VERSION:
As Oz (Matthew Perry), Jimmy (Bruce Willis), and Jill (Amanda Peet) are gathering weapons at Oz’s house before meeting Lazlo (Kevin Pollak) to exchange Cynthia (Natasha Henstridge) for Strabo (Frank Collison), Strabo manages to get free of his bindings and tries to escape in the trio’s rental car. However, upon seeing Jimmy nearby and Oz and Jill approaching with their guns, he tries to hide in the trunk while leaving its lid ajar. Jill accidentally closes it on him, and he soon lets them know that both he and the car keys are stuck in there, and they let Lazlo know of this when they call him. While trying to get Strabo out, an unseen hitman of Lazlo’s starts shooting at them, and a few bullets hit the trunk area. Jimmy hotwires the car so the trio can escape.

Upon arriving back at the motel they were staying at, they open the trunk and discover that Strabo was killed by the bullets. Jimmy angrily places the blame on Jill for this and also insults her marksmanship, so Jill decides to leave him. After Jimmy gets his bag out of the car, she drives off in it. Jimmy then tells Oz that he is leaving him on his own, but upon checking the bag, he discovers that he accidentally took Jill’s bag. Meanwhile, Jill looks inside Jimmy’s bag and finds one half of a dollar bill. 

Oz takes a cab to his dental office, and Jimmy tails him in another and calls up Jill about the bill. Jimmy tells her that he insulted her in order to chase her away and therefore keep her safe, but Jill tells him that she doesn’t trust him anymore, and she doesn’t want to have a kid with someone she can’t trust. She demands to know how far back his business with this bill goes, so he tells her that it goes back a long time, and Cynthia is in on it, and he kept Jill in the dark about it because he didn’t want to see her get hurt. He tells her that he needs to help Oz, and to do that, he must go to Lazlo’s place, and demands that she do everything he has told her.  

Oz tells his receptionist Julie (Tasha Smith) all about his adventures up to this point and then tells her to call the FBI. Jimmy then appears and tells Oz that he considers him a friend, and he can’t let him or Cynthia or anyone else pay for his past sins anymore. After Oz yells for Julie to not call the FBI, she suddenly chloroforms Jimmy and then pulls a gun on Oz. She reveals herself to be Frankie Figueroa’s sister, out for revenge on Jimmy for killing her brother, and then she chloroforms him, too.

Jimmy and Oz wake up next to Cynthia in Lazlo’s hideout. Cynthia tells Jimmy that she was unable to find “it”, and Oz realizes that she had allowed herself to get kidnapped. Lazlo then appears with Julie and demands to know where Strabo is, and Oz replies that he’d better let them go by 11 o’clock or else Jill will kill him. Jill then appears outside in the car and tells Lazlo that she wants to talk business with him or else she’ll kill Strabo. She then shows Strabo tied up to make it seem like he is not dead, and also warns him that the car is wired with explosives. After getting inside, she orders Lazlo and his men to drop their weapons and untie the trio under the threat of pressing the detonator.

She then shows Lazlo the half of the dollar she has, and tells him that she’ll give it to him if she can work for him as a hitter. Lazlo agrees, so long as he gets Strabo back and she performs a test of loyalty by killing Jimmy. Jimmy mocks her marksmanship again and challenges her to shoot a nearby lamp. She successfully shoots it, and after Jimmy insults her some more, she shoots him, and he falls lifeless to the floor. Lazlo commends her and then takes her detonator and gun while a couple of his men get Strabo, but after telling her that he knows that the detonator is actually a garage door opener, he reneges on the deal by handing the gun to Julie and ordering her to keep it pointed at Jill. He then retrieves the other half of the dollar bill from a hiding place, saying that the first dollar he ever stole is now back together.

However, it turns out Jill didn’t lie about the car being wired with explosives, for Lazlo’s men activate the trigger on the driver’s side door, and the explosion kills them while the force of the blast floors everyone else. Lazlo gets up and tries to shoot Jill, but Oz hits him with a chair to stop him, and suddenly, Jimmy gets up and shoots the other henchmen dead. Jill then starts kissing Jimmy, and it is revealed that she used a real bullet on the lamp and a blank round on him, and a blood packet in his shirt was used to simulate the gunshot wound. Jimmy also tells Oz that, when he shot at him back in Mexico, that too was also part of his and Cynthia’s plan. After Lazlo yells that they have killed Strabo, Jimmy informs Lazlo that the hitter he earlier sent to kill them had killed Strabo, which turns out to be Julie. Lazlo grabs Jill’s gun and makes her shoot and kill her.

Jimmy tells Jill to tie Lazlo up, but she wants to kill him. They get into an argument about it, and at the height of it, Jimmy admits that she can’t kill Lazlo because he is his foster father. Lazlo says that Jimmy can’t kill him, prompting Jimmy to aim his gun at him. However, Jimmy ends up proving him right, so he just has Jill shoot him in the foot. Oz demands to know what this whole mess is all about, but Jimmy grabs the two halves of the dollar and thanks Lazlo for the “inheritance”, and then he and the others split before the cops show up to arrest Lazlo.

While driving away, Oz once again demands to know what is going on, so Jimmy shows him the bill and says that this has the number for Lazlo’s main account in the Grand Caymans containing $280 million, and half of that will be going to him and Cynthia. He and Cynthia had been trying to get Lazlo’s half of the bill this whole time. Jill admits to Oz that she didn’t know of the whole plot until this afternoon, and then she tells Jimmy that she has found out that she is pregnant. Jimmy starts crying tears of joy over this as they all continue driving on into the night.