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Submitted by Steve

POOPER
Wickham is a zombie, and he is leading the zombie horde.  London falls, but the last bridge separating it from the rest of England is destroyed before they can cross.  Liz and Darcy marry, as do Jane and Bingley.

LONG VERSION
Set in 19th Century England, The Black Plague has spread throughout the country, turning it’s victims into zombies.  The city of London has been walled off and the Royal Moat surrounds it, with only one heavily guarded bridge connecting it with the rest of England.  That area is known as the In-Between, and nearby estates are surrounded with fortified barriers, and the citizenry have been studying the martial arts in order to defeat the zombies.

As the movie opens, Colonel Darcy (Sam Riley) has just killed the recently-bitten patriarch of the Featherstone family.  After Darcy is told he couldn’t have infected anyone else, Darcy leaves, then we see others in the house have already turned.  Meanwhile, the 5 daughters of the Bennet family have just returned from China, having been sent there by their father (Charles Dance) to learn the martial arts.  They are, from oldest to youngest:  Elizabeth (Lily James), Jane (Bella Heathcoate), Kitty (Suki Waterhouse), Lydia (Ellie Bamber), and Mary (Millie Brady).  Mrs. Bennet is only concerned with finding husbands for her daughters, and she has them attend a ball thrown by their rich new neighbor, Mr. Bingley (Douglas Booth).  At the dance, Bingley is immediately smitten by Jane, while Elizabeth is snubbed by Bingley’s friend, Colonel Darcy.  Liz runs outside to cry, and she is met by Mrs. Featherstone, who has been turned into a zombie.  As she is about to bite Liz, she is killed by Darcy.  The rest of the turned Featherstones then attack the ball, and the Bennet sisters proceed to use their newly-learned skills to slay all of the zombies.  After seeing her fight, Darcy becomes smitten with Liz.

The next day, Jane is invited to Bingley’s for tea.  On her way there, she is attacked by zombies.  When she arrives, she is wounded, so Darcy has her confined to a guest room for fear that she was bitten.  Liz travels there to help care for her sister, and to make sure Darcy doesn’t kill her.  It turns out to have only been a fever brought on by an infected hand injury when her gun backfired, and Jane soon recovers and she and Liz return home.  Upon returning home, they learn that Mr. Bennet has invited their cousin Parson Collins (Matt Smith) for dinner, for the purpose of marrying one of the sisters.  He proposes to Liz, but he asks her to give up her life of zombie fighting as a condition of the marriage.  She refuses to do so, and he leaves.

To make up for the previously interrupted ball, Bingley throws another one.  Here, Liz meets Lieutenant George Wickham (Jack Huston), a charming soldier who also has a history with Darcy.  At the ball, Jane is expecting Bingley to officially propose to her, something that Mrs. Bennet believes will lead to her other daughters finding rich husbands.  Darcy overhears this and runs off.  But before he can propose, Bingley and Liz come across zombies.  They attack, and Darcy joins in the fight.  They defeat the zombies, but Bingley is injured in the fight and Darcy takes him to get medical help.  A few days later, Bingley writes a letter to Jane, telling her that he is leaving to return to London, and their relationship is over so he can marry Darcy’s sister.

One day, Liz runs into Wickham, and he decides to take her into the In-Between to St. Lazarus Church.  Inside, there are zombies, but unlike the ones she has been fighting, these ones are civilized.  They only eat pig brains, Wickham tells her.  They don’t turn savage until they eat human brains.  He wants to utilize these civilized zombies to show that humans and zombies can co-exist.  Later, he meets with Lady Catherine de Bourgh (Lena Headey), and tries to convince her of his plan.  It would end the war that is bankrupting all of Great Britain, and it will save humanity.  She, along with her nephew Darcy, scoff at his plan and he has him thrown out of her house.

That night, Wickham meets up with Liz and tells her that it was Darcy who convinced Bingley to break up with Jane.  Darcy felt she was beneath Bingley and only wanted to marry him for his money.  Wickham also asks Liz to elope with him, but she refuses.  The next day, Darcy arrives and proclaims his love to Liz and asks her to marry him.  Liz responds by kicking his ass.  Later, Liz receives a letter from Darcy explaining his actions.  He didn’t mean to hurt Jane, but he truly believed their mother when he overheard her say that she wanted her daughters to marry for money.  Bingley really loved Jane, and he is at fault for ending that relationship.  As for Wickham, they don’t get along because he has a history of getting in the good graces of a family, marrying their daughter, and then squandering their fortune and moving on.  He tried that with his sister, but Darcy convinced her to end that relationship and he and Wickham have been enemies ever since.  The letter concludes with a warning.  The zombies have organized and attacked London, and the city is nearly lost.  If they breach the bridge, then all of England, as well as the world, is in jeopardy.  Liz and her sisters must be ready for the biggest fight of their lives.

Upon returning home, Liz learns from Jane that Wickham has taken Lydia to St. Lazarus.  Before Liz can leave, Lady Catherine shows up, demanding to know if she and her nephew are engaged.  She says no, but won’t promise they never will be one day.  Catherine has her bodyguard fight Liz, but she is able to defeat him.  Impressed, Catherine agrees to take the rest of the Bennet family to her estate for their protection, while Liz and Jane go to the In-Between to rescue Lydia.  On the way there, they come across a potter’s field full of zombies attacking two men.  They turn out to be Darcy and Bingley, and the four of them take out the zombies.  Afterward, Liz tells Darcy that Wickham has Lydia at St. Lazarus, but he tells her the church was destroyed in the battle, and she couldn’t have survived.

That night, Darcy heads out to the not-destroyed St. Lazarus to rescue Lydia.  Before he left, he stole the brains from dead soldiers.  However, Liz learned from Bingley what Darcy is doing and followed him.  At the church, Darcy is able to rescue Lydia, but is caught by Wickham,  It turns out he is the one who is organizing the zombies and will use the civilized zombies to control London, and soon all of England.  However, Darcy fed the human brains to the zombies, making them savage, and they attack Wickham while he and Lydia escape.  Darcy sends Lydia back across the bridge while tries to hold off the zombie horde.  Liz then arrives and sees Lydia ride away, and she goes to rescue Darcy.  During the fight, Wickham shows up and fights him.  Darcy stabs him in the chest, but is unhurt.  It turns out Wickham was a civilized zombie all along.  Liz shows up and cuts off Wickham’s arm and rescues Darcy.  They are crossing the bridge to safety when it is blown up as a precaution to save England.  Liz is okay but Darcy is seriously injured.

Sometime later, the Bennet’s are still living with Lady Catherine, when Bingley arrives to speak to Jane.  After hearing the truth from Darcy, he amicably ended his relationship with Darcy’s sister and asks Jane to marry him, and she says yes.  While that is happening, Darcy shows up (fully recovered from his injuries) and thanks Liz for saving his life.  He then asks her to marry him, and she says yes.  The movie ends with the double wedding of Liz to Darcy and Jane to Bingley.  But during the credits, Wickham is seen with the zombie horde about to attack the wedding party.  

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