Submitted by Tornado Dragon

After Billy (Adam Grimes) spends a day and a half training at Pine Mountain Academy, Colonel Jaffe (Peter Jason) summons him into his office and tells him that he is expelling him from the academy because he thinks that he is grossly untalented (the real reason is that he just doesn’t like him). Before Billy exits the office, he drops a not-so-subtle hint to Jaffe about his daughter Winter (Baelyn Neff) being a very promiscuous girl. Jaffe becomes enraged with him for perpetuating this “lie” about her, so he gets on the P.A. system and informs everyone about Billy’s expulsion before ordering a “Code Red” on him. This results in Brandt (Oliver Macready) and a couple of his fellow “richies” – who have never liked Billy, either – beating up Billy and then stuffing him into a metal garbage can, then sealing the lid with duct tape (but punching a hole in the top so that he can breathe) before kicking the can down the mountain. That night, Brandt starts dating Billy’s best friend Casey (Carmen Nicole) in the hope of eventually sleeping with her, and over dinner, he spins a bunch of lies to her about Billy, with him quitting the academy being one of them.

Five days later, Billy – having managed to stay alive by consuming the lickings inside of the can – finally gets free when he rolls into the middle of a road and a car hits him. He goes into Naomibucks to meet with Naomi (Traci Lords), J.P. (Phil Morris), and the other “poories”, and he first apologizes to them for being a jerk and for trying to fit in with the wrong crowd before urging them to stand up and fight back against the richies and take back Schittville in general and Pine Mountain in particular. One of the poories then informs him that Casey is dating Brandt and is probably sleeping with him right now, but J.P. advises Billy to get himself cleaned up before doing something about it. Billy returns to his and Casey’s apartment to shower, and around the time that he is finished, Casey and Brandt enter the abode, having just went on another date. Brandt soon tries to turn up the heat between them, but Casey quickly puts a stop to it, and he casually confesses to her that he is already wearing a condom before he then refers to her as a poorie. Casey tells him that going out with him was a big mistake because she realizes now that she likes Billy, which is why she moved to Schittville with him in the first place. When she asks Brandt to leave, he tries to force himself onto her, but Billy comes out and gets his attention. Unfortunately, when he tries to punch Brandt, he faints from malnourishment and dehydration, and Casey rightfully accuses Brandt of having a lot to do with Billy’s current condition. She finally makes Brandt leave by threatening to hit him with a beer bottle, but he takes off his condom and flings it onto Billy’s face before he goes. Casey removes the rubber, cleans Billy’s face, and then kisses him.

Later, Billy is shown hanging out with J.P. at the local bar, and J.P. eventually tells him that he is the finest natural-born snowboarder that he has ever seen and that he might be the one who will take the poories to prominence. However, he must first earn the respect of the townsfolk, and the best way to do that would be to tackle the Goat, the steepest and most dangerous vertical run on Pine Mountain (and in the whole country) that only two out of seven people have ever done and survived (with him being one of the two). Billy decides to do it and lets everyone in town know about it, including Jaffe. Despite an attempt by Jaffe to kill him with a sniper rifle bullet and causing an avalanche when he misses, Billy makes it to the bottom of the Goat alive and in one piece. As Casey, J.P., and the other poories are toasting Billy on his accomplishment at the bar afterward, Jaffe suddenly enters the establishment, accompanied by Winter and the richies. Jaffe tells Billy that he wants to talk to him, but J.P. reminds Jaffe that, because Billy boarded the Goat, this means that Pine Mountain is open for ALL people to use again, not just the richies. Jaffe counters that he knows the law of the mountain, and the law states that any team can challenge any other team to a no-holds-barred Chinese Downhill race to the bottom for total domination of Pine Mountain. He and the richies then officially issue this challenge to Billy and the poories, and they accept it.

Billy wins the race for the poories, and as the gang celebrates back at the bar, Billy has a romantic slow dance with Casey and tells her that he loves her. Blind Danny (Ron Zimmerman) talks to Naomi and asks her if she will be his “seeing-eye wife”, and she accepts and kisses him. Jaffe then enters again with Winter and the richies and tells the poories that they have ruined snowboarding for them, so they are saying goodbye and taking their Olympic-level skills elsewhere because he has invented a new sport called “one-board boatless water-skiing” (though J.P. quickly deduces that that is surfing). The bartender (Rick Overton) then tries to instigate another fight between the social castes, but Billy stops his fellow poories and tries to appeal to everyone’s better natures by saying that they ought to make Schittville an example of equality. However, after Brandt makes some lewd remarks directed at Casey, Billy smashes a beer bottle over his head and knocks him out, and the fight gets underway.

01 hours 23 minutes