(1971)

Submitted by Evil Ed

Sean Connery returns as 007 after a one film hiatus and apparently kills Ernst Stavro Blofeld (Charles Gray) in the opening scene. Bond is then sent on a mission to determine who is stockpiling smuggled diamonds.

He finds that SPECTRE has built a giant orbiting satellite, inlaid with the stolen diamonds, to focus solar energy into a laser beam that can destroy any target on Earth. Bond and Tiffany Case (Jill St. John and her bikini) infiltrate an oil rig that SPECTRE is using to control the satellite while Felix Leiter (Norman Burton) and billionaire Willard Whyte (Jimmy Dean) lead a military helicopter assault on the complex.

It turns out that Blofeld has had plastic surgery performed on several henchmen, so there is no way of knowing who is the real Blofeld. During the assault, 007 takes over the crane that is lowering a one-man escape pod containing the last remaining Blofeld and smashes it into the satellite control center.

After the successful attack, Tiffany and Bond are taking a vacation on Willard’s ocean liner. Also onboard are the hilarious pair of gay assassins Mr. Kidd (Putter Smith) and Mr. Wint (Bruce Glover). The pair impersonate waiters and attempt to serve Tiffany and Bond a booby-trapped cake.

Bond recognizes Mr. Kidd’s cologne from a previous murder attempt and fights the pair. Mr. Kidd attempts to skewer Bond with flaming shish-kabobs and is set on fire when Bond throws wine on him. Mr. Kidd falls overboard and after Tiffany throws the cake at Mr. Wint, the bomb is uncovered. Bond straps the bomb to Mr. Wint, tosses Mr. Wint over the railing and Mr. Wint explodes on the way down.

The last line of the movie is Tiffany asking Bond as they look up at the night sky at the satellite, “James, how the hell are we going to get those diamonds back?”